I believe in Relationships
I believe that relationships can be very difficult and very smooth at points, but the rough times will make the relationship stronger. “If there is no struggle there can be no progress.” Without any struggles in a relationship there wouldn’t be anything to progress to build on.
A momentum shift can happen with the slightest word and kill a whole entire day. I am one of those people that can go from laughing and smiling to a serious face in a blink of an eye.
One time recently, the week of the Student Summit Maine trip my girlfriend Vivian and I had many disagreements on various topics and thoughts, more than usual. Our relationship in my prospective was hitting rock bottom, which I didn’t want so we talked it out multiple times and we apologized to each other also.
In one of our text messages that I apparently took the wrong way Vivian stated that an old friend of hers was trying to hang out with her but not how average friends would hang out but in a sexual type of way. When the comment was said it triggered my mind and got me furious quickly and stopped the conversation to a screeching stop with a “ttyl I’m done” then put my away message and left my phone to collect messages. With my heart racing to let of the anger that I felt I began to exercise and do pushups to relieve my mind. Then I went to bed and woke up and thought about how hurt I felt and what my next actions were towards my relationship. Very aggressively I began to doubt the feelings Vivian said she had for me and asked myself why? Why feel the pain that I feel anymore? I thought heavily to end our relationship on a stop of a dime.
My enthusiasm towards the quote said by Fredrick Douglass is because it is very much true. Even in the best relationships there can be minor disagreements. One of my disagreements could be about staying on the same topic and having Vivian ask to switch the topic. Then see her reaction against it and decide to still talk about the subject that they didn’t want to talk about in the first place. With that said it could make a good day into the worse day ever also with a headache on top. But all it takes is one I love you to make things go well again. With those disagreements I think our relationship has gotten better and stronger and we stopped with that arguing phase. I believe that incident had to happen one way or another; since it happened already it seemed to make us more passionate towards each other. To me it’s better to express your feelings and thoughts early instead of holding them in so you can hold out on an argument.
Like the phrase that people sometimes say “A relationship without arguments isn’t really a relationship.” This is very much true, I tell Vivian all the time that I love what we have and wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. Also that we have a real relationship and it’s ok to get mad. The day I don’t get mad is the day I don’t love her.
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