This I Believe

Holly - Lawrenceville, Georgia
Entered on April 22, 2009
Age Group: 30 - 50
  • Listen to This I Believe on RadioPublic

  • Podcasts

    Sign up for our free, weekly podcast of featured essays. You can download recent episodes individually, or subscribe to automatically receive each podcast. Learn more.

  • FAQ

    Frequently asked questions about the This I Believe project, educational opportunities and more...

  • Top Essays USB Drive

    This USB drive contains 100 of the top This I Believe audio broadcasts of the last ten years, plus some favorites from Edward R. Murrow's radio series of the 1950s. It's perfect for personal or classroom use! Click here to learn more.

I believe that I should be able to wake up with the sunrise and sleep with the sunset. What does this statement really mean? I think it is simple – I would like to break away from the linear time that Western culture has established and pressed upon our society. I would like to enjoy the freedom of living without a schedule, or at least live with a schedule that I have contrived for myself –wishful thinking for an educator who raises at 5 a.m. every morning. I am in constant bondage for at least 9 months during the year. Maybe, I don’t have the right to complain but here goes.

As a society we are too obsessed and consumed with time. As a result, people truly don’t enjoy the present because they are continuously worried about how they will spend their time in the future. The present which should be relaxing and carefree, becomes bogged down by the pressure of what is to come, instead of relishing in the enjoyment of what is. For example, you are at an exquisite little dinner party with a couple of your most beloved friends. However, in the middle of that party while you should be enjoying a crisp glass of white wine, your mind becomes weighed down by the remembrance of a pending medical bill which is due the following week.

Now instead of relaxing, you become anxious over the fact that you do not have enough money in your checking account to cover the bill. The present time which should be filled with wonderment now floods itself with the stress of something that will not actually manifest for another week. This creates a headache. This creates stress.

So at times, I choose to shake off the offenses of western culture. I refuse to be chained to a time clock. I refuse to even wear a watch. I even turn my cell phone off (which at the present time considering its usage should probably be renamed sin cell). Sometimes, I exist in a realm that is timeless. Not worrying about the schedule…it’s called spontaneity. It feels great, no actually it is exhilarating. At those moments “all mean egotism” disappears and I become one with the present moment. Living, breathing, and existing in a circular motion spiritually becoming one with the elements – not the things of time. So to wakeup with the sunrise and sleep at sunset void of all structured constraints reeks of a freedom I wish to smell.