Bathroom Etiquette

I believe in great bathroom experiences. Being able to walk into a restroom without worries or fears. The freedom to relax and feel at home in a sanitary public bathroom or in the convenience of your own home. Having running water to flush, hot water to wash, and paper towels to dry. Walking on clean tiles, listening to soft music, inspecting yourself in a clean mirror, and smelling the overpowering scent of ‘Big Red’ or ‘Tropical Breeze.’ I believe in great bathroom experiences.

Three to five times a day I must stop all activity and take care of my needs. If I choose to postpone or delay the inevitable my best day can turn into my worst day. Often times there is plenty of warning to be able to plan around it or to make a convenient stop on my way to class. But like I sometimes choose to wait till the next gas station while driving my car, I always run the risk of not making it. Such risks help me to appreciate the high value of restrooms. What would I do if I didn’t have a bathroom? How could I go on without making that necessary stop three to five times a day?!

One of the first things that I notice when approaching the door of a restroom is that which hits my nose. The cleanest looking restroom is no better than the dirtiest one if they both smell the same. A friend once told me after working the summer for ‘Honey Buckets’ that the outside port-a-potties always filled up first. I assume because they were the closest. When searching for a stall I now pick the middle ones. With tranquil waterfall music playing softly in the background and refreshed air filling my nostrils, I can now let down my guard and enter the stall. I love finding seat covers and not having to make my own. Automatic flushers are a plus but I always seem to manage with my size 10s. When I was on my mission I valued my bathroom time greatly, for it was my only time alone. Peaceful time to ponder and think. I learn to appreciate the worth of a well kept bathroom when I see one that is not. Flushing with a bucket after finding there’s no running water, or covering your nose with your shirt as to not pass out or throw up. Broken sinks and empty paper towel dispensers all add to my appreciation for a great bathroom experience.

I think that perhaps that the greatest of all bathroom experiences could be when I can reach over and grab from a correctly placed roll of toilet paper. You see a roll of toilet paper takes on character when you see it through my eyes. When I look at it from the side I begin to see a very interesting, natural and possible even beautiful shape. The water of a waterfall falls out and away from the cliff much like my paper rolls over the top and away from the wall. A fern sprouts into a spiral, again out and away from the plant to naturally droop down. When I view a woman from the side, her long hair coming off the back of her head also forms this same beautiful look. Why then, should my roll of toilet paper be any different. I should never have to reach under and up to pull down and away from the wall. It should be as the woman facing the wall, with her hair flowing out and away. When finished I can peacefully and much more relaxed wash my hands with soapy suds and warm water. I believe in and love great bathroom experiences.