Looking Forward

Nicholas - Plano, Texas
Entered on March 11, 2009
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: setbacks
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I had the biggest epiphany a couple years back, people need to appreciate the good, and completely forget about the bad. I have known people whose lives aren’t going well, and since they dwell on the negative aspects of life, they are stuck. They have the potential to recover, and excel in spite of the adversity, but they cannot disregard the pain and sorrow they’ve experienced for long enough to discover their potential.

I, like many others, have gone through a lot in my life, in fourth grade, my sister died of seizures and a brain tumor, in seventh grade my granddad died of several cancers. My parents got divorced, and when I turned thirteen, my mom met a man, ‘ol Boy’, he would constantly attempt to fight me or my brother, he would hold us by the collar of our shirts and try to force us to obey his every command, even though I had only known him for a month. But my mom was too concerned with not being alone to care about our opinion of him.

Eventually my brother and I had enough, ol Boy said that we either respect him and do what ever he says or we can leave. So, being normal human beings, we left. We had no money, so we stayed with friends, then when my brother turned 16, he got a job, and we ended up getting a place with our best friend Scott. My brother and I have a lot of Psychopathic Records merchandise, some of which is worth hundreds if not thousands of dollars, and the sentimental value is much higher. When we left the house, he stole a good amount of the stuff. While my brother and I were living away from home, he took a life size stand up, among other things (which some people were willing to pay $300+ for) and he drew all over the whole thing with crayon and paint, writing several obscenities, rendering the dollar value as well as the sentimental value completely worthless.

I was at special programs at the time, which is very, very far from where I was living and I had to get rides from my friends, of whom I am eternally indebted to. I was still too young to get a job, and we never had food, we just had what my brother could afford for the night.

Some other people might have given up, lost care and motivation, but I decided, while what has previously occurred in my life sucks, my life will not improve unless I worry about my future and forget about ol Boy, and living on my own. I needed to care more about getting through school, in order to get a good job, provide a better life for my future family and myself. While I am not responsible for my past, my future is unquestionably my responsibility. Spending the present dwelling on the past prevents achieving my much deserved and greatly yearned for future.