Single Parent Success

Allyx - Pittsburg, Kansas
Entered on February 22, 2009
Age Group: 18 - 30
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This I Believe-Single Parent Success

I believe that as a single parent it is possible to create a happy, healthy environment where a family can prosper. I am a 24-year-old single mother, raising my 2-year-old daughter Leif, on my own. Her father is absent by his own choice and I frequently have concerns on how the lack of a relationship with her father will effect her growth and personality, not to mention the occasional doubts I have about my ability to raise my daughter by myself. That being said, I know first hand that being a part of a single parent family does not have to be a weakness and I have found many ways to facilitate this idea. First and most importantly focusing on the things that I believe to be weaknesses about our family or the absence of my daughter’s father has never been productive for me. If anything, this brings me down very quickly and I become discouraged. I focus on the things that I believe to be strengths; this builds my confidence and empowers me to make better choices in the interest of my small family.

My commitment to my daughter and our lifestyle is my highest priority. Its not always easy to stay focused but with a look into Leif’s bright, beautiful, brown eyes, I am reminded of how much I love her, the importance of our future and my role in keeping us on the right path. The time that we share with each other reinforces our bond and my commitment to my daughter. Time is of the essence, some for her and me as well. Spending time together to build on our relationship is essential for both of us. Care and consideration for her needs both physical and emotional are necessary. I think that every child should know that their needs are meaningful and showing them this love and consideration helps to mold them into more caring individuals toward others. Time for me is also necessary, whether it be a private evening or a 30-minute TV show. I’m a single mother but just another person as well and I need time to do the things that I enjoy on my own to maintain my own identity. A schedule is a vital tool for keeping on track and organizing responsibilities. In my case, there is always room for improvement.

With regard to responsibilities, I’m not sure that any family, single parent or not, can be successful without taking them seriously. Responsibly managing everyday needs such as chores, bills or school requirements does wonders in making life run smoothly. All of these small responsibilities are often overwhelming for me but I try to stay on top of them because getting behind only creates more problems. Financial responsibilities are possibly the heaviest and dependability is vital in keeping or moving up in a job. I believe that even at a young age children learn from the examples that are set for them and benefit from haveing responsibilities of their own.

Maintaining a positive outlook on parenting and my life in general is what keeps me going everyday. I love my role as a mother and there are so many things that I enjoy in life. Staying active contributes to my good frame of mind. My daughter and I enjoy gymnastics, swimming and camping. These activities serve as rewards for the hard work shared between us. Determining family goals is another way to stay positive. Having something to work for or look forward to gives me even more of a since of purpose. Our goals up lift us and help my daughter and I to both continue growing.

There are also other means in helping families to excel. Obtaining job skills and finding a reputable daycare has helped us both to continue moving forward. Education is truly fundamental and I look forward to it taking us too many wonderful places. Support systems are tools I use to reinforce our foundation. Family members, daycare and friends all help to encourage me when I need it or take place in any number of functions where I employ them. One of the most important aspects of support systems is that there are several individuals around us that severe as admirable role modes for my daughter. Being that she does not have her father to look to, these people are extremely important in helping me to shape my daughters values.

By using these and other methods, I plan to build a strong foundation for the future of both my daughter and myself. I am always looking for new and innovative ways of doing this. I will continue to enjoy my life with my daughter and my role as a single parent. I can only hope that I will be successful in my quest.