I believe in accepting fate

michael - burbank, Illinois
Entered on February 2, 2009
Age Group: 30 - 50
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Many years ago, I started my own construction business, I just received my first big job, tuck-pointing a building on a used car sales lot. One day; one of my employees called me and informed me that the brakes on my truck had went out. He had my truck towed to the repair shop on the job site. As I drove to the job site, perspiration started to build as I was already worrying about how much the repairs were going to start cutting into my profits.

As I drove up to the job site and saw how little work they had done in two days I became furious. I parked my car and walked up to one of my employees named Ken and asked why it took three men to do the work of one. He gave me some unreasonable excuse that did not make sense. I started walking toward the office to talk to the owner about the repairs for my truck. The owner said he would make the repairs on my truck immediately so I would be able to use the truck to finish the job. He would take the money owed for the repairs off his bill for the tuck-pointing. He then jokingly asked where I had found my employees. I had hit my boiling point, walked out the door and fired everyone. Wanting to finish the job the right way I called my local union hall and hired three real tuck-pointers to finish the work. They would cost more and the profits were almost gone. My first real job had become so much of a disaster that I became mentally distraught.

Currently my directions and goals are scattered. My anxiety is fed by my reactions and actions of others. Can I change by shaping my life by an act or action in my life and alter my own conduct? Alternatively, will some unreasonable act increase my insecurity about my challenges I am facing.

Days later the owner paid me in full and thanked me for doing a great job (I later received more work).Over all, I made a few dollars, my truck was repaired and I was paid for the job. As I look back, I wondered to myself, why did I put myself through all that aggravation?

Several years ago, while at work, I fell several feet off a ladder and shattered my wrist. That left me with limited range and motion and permanent nerve damage that causes relentless stabbing pain in my hand and arm daily. The doctors said there is nothing more they can do than prescribe pain medication which only takes the edge off the pain. Every day I look back at my first job and remind myself that it all depends on how you look at yourself and your situation and realize that today I can accept my fate.