I believe, I believe too much and I know too little

Christopher - Green Bay, Wisconsin
Entered on December 13, 2008
Age Group: 30 - 50
Themes: question

Lazy Sunday mornings are time when I indulge myself and allow for idle thoughts as well as an accounting and reflection of the weeks events with the hope for some reconciliation. What I have come to believe in those moments is I believe too much, and what I believe far outweighs the content of what I know. Now more than ever barrages of information, that I can only hope to be true, are sandwiched between the interpretive beliefs of others. What scares me is that acting on those unexamined beliefs has resulted in a kind of mish-mash existence of habitually reinforced ‘going-ons’ that are only periodically punctuated by rare and much needed moments of reflection where I ask myself, “What is this?” I believe true change comes from taking the time to extend those moments of reflection from, “What is this?” to examine “What is this that makes what I am?” I believe that the most dangerous bias is not the one that comes outwardly but rather the unexamined inward bias that we unassumingly tote in the baggage of the self. And with all due fairness can the former be fairly considered without the latter being fully unpacked? I find that in those rare moments when I am not overwhelmed by information and I force myself to examine my thoughts, in what becomes an all to often uncomfortable silence, is that those thoughts are as informing and relevant as the world events that surround me. Maybe that silence is so disconcerting because it provides a time to report upon the irresponsibility of acting on the knowledge of so little. Although I am limited to myself, I have no one else to blame in the depth of my internal journalistic efforts or editorial process. While not necessarily globally relevant of its’ own accord, this perspective provides up to date, reliable information on the content of my immediate view of reality and what I choose to believe. Such honesty with one’s self can, without a doubt, cause suffering. On many occasions, those well-intended Sunday mornings of rest and reflection have degenerated in to a mixed bag of regret and self-loathing. But unpacking some of that baggage of belief I am slowly able to uncover a little light of compassion that has been deeply buried. I believe that conceptual clashes have the equal potential for personal suffering and personal growth. What I have come to know as fact is that when acted upon these combined, unanalyzed beliefs can impact this interdependent planet to a great detriment. I believe that the most relevant news that we need to report on is not new but rather an examination of the old cracks in the foundations of each of our beliefs that both houses and conceals the heart of humanity. I believe that objective journalism demands both compassion and personal integrity which are still built upon the age-old Socratic advice of “Know thy self.”