Jamie - Maryland
Entered on November 19, 2008
Age Group: 30 - 50


Marriage used to be known as something you entered into as a lifelong thing, but it seems that in the time we now live in, marriage is no different than having a girlfriend/boyfriend. People nowadays change wives or husbands almost as fast, in some cases, as they may change girlfriends or boyfriends.

What happened to the vows of marriage? Why do people not stay married anymore? I believe that people do not stay married because they do not have God as the center in their life. When they have God as the center of their life, they strive to be more mature and less self-centered.

It seems that some people who are married get tired of being married to the same person for so many years. This I do not understand since you can be friends with someone for many, many years and not get tired of them. Yet married people get tired of each other and they are supposed to be in love. So, if they are in love, why do they get divorced? Well, some get divorced because they have found someone else they like better, or they do not like how the other person does or does not do something. They get mad and end up fighting and, well, divorce happens.

What happened to love? Did they not know this person before they got married? I know that my father has told me that you will never ever know the person completely. Even after years of marriage, you still learn about them. But this fact that people get tired of their spouse or just find someone else they like better, I believe is because they have not matured; for if they where truly mature, they would realize they need to work things out with their spouse the same as they would with their best friend. Furthermore, maturity means not looking around to see what else is out there. Once one is married, they should stop looking.

I remember this person who told me one time that they were getting divorced and I asked, “Why?” He said that his wife was selfish and only thought of herself. Yet this man had showed signs himself of being someone who thought he was really something. I did not know his wife but I knew him and I was not impressed with him. Is it possible that if he would not have thought so well of himself, he would have realized that his wife was not as selfish as he thought? I have seen myself where feeling that I am so good, or right, made me feel that anyone who thought different was wrong.

Simply put, I believe that God first in marriage leads to happiness, not divorce.