Never quiet doing something no matter how hard it is

jacob - buda, Texas
Entered on August 29, 2008
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: work

Some days I just want to stop everything, I just want to quiet living life because I fell somewhat like a robot. Between training to become a marine someday and weight training and trying my best in school I just feel like I am being controlled, I feel like I can’t even live my own life. I am always being told when to lift, when to move, when to speak. Sometimes I just want to say enough I am done with all of this but then I think about why I am doing everything that I do.

I think to myself “what if?” What if I didn’t lift weights? what if I didn’t try in school? What if I didn’t try to become a marine? I always have the answer to that question that I ask myself I always say so I can do something with my life. So I know I can help my mom or my family or even myself. I try as hard as I can in school so that my mom doesn’t have to worry about how I will find money to move on in school after high school. I try to do the whole ROTC thing so that I can become a marine someday, so that my family can be proud. I try hard in lifting weight just so I know I can protect the ones I love.

Another thing that brings me back down to earth is some of my friends I used to hang out with some are in jail some do drugs some are drop outs, and I do want to be like one of them. I don’t want to be a drop I want to go in to collage, I don’t want to do drugs I want to get stronger in life and I don’t want to do drugs I want to be in the marines. I don’t want to be just another teen who is a dead bet I want to do something with my life I don’t want to just be another bad statistic among teens I want to be something better than that.

So if you haven’t yet figured out my believe, my believe is that even if things are hard now and just make you want to quiet don’t , because if you do thing are only going to get harder for you as you go on through life.