My Grandfather died three years before I was born, so naturally I never got the chance to learn from his experiences. Most of the people in my family that knew Grandfather well say that I am like him in so many ways (especially when it comes to my temper). It made me sad that I would never get the chance to spend time with him, hear his stories, sit on his lap, and be “Granddad’s Baby Girl”.
Well, a few years ago I decided to stop grieving. I felt that mourning his life was not fitting for one such as my Grandfather. I started celebrating his life and it made me so immensely happy. I’ve made scrapbooks from old pictures I found of him at my Grandmothers house, the house my Grandfather built. I go to his grave two or three times a month with a candle, coffee, and donuts, and I talk with him. I fill him in on what’s going on with my Grandmother, my Father and Uncle, my brothers, and me. I spill my heart out to a cold piece of stone that marks my Grandfather. Now, most people would call me crazy, but it’s the happiest place in the world for me. Why? Its because I’m honoring him and celebrating his life by including him in mine, and I am not grieving because he is gone.
Last April, a very good friend of mine was taken from this world in a horrific motorcycle accident. I grieved for months, wallowing in the void that his loss has created in my heart. On the one year anniversary of his death, I stopped grieving, because I knew that he wouldn’t want me to be sad anymore. He would have told me I was being ridiculous and I needed to go on. Well, I did go on; on to celebrating his life in everything I do, every memory I have of him.
It’s taken me a long time to get to this point, where thinking of the dead and gone has made me happy. If you think of it though, yeah, losing someone you love hurts, but do you think they would really want you to stop your life for sorrow? I know my grandfather and friend wouldn’t have wanted me to. I celebrate their lives, their happiness, their sacrifices, and their love by remembering them and trying to spread the happiness they would’ve wanted for everyone else as well.
Through the power of internal strength, love, and remembrance, happiness and celebration are possible…This I believe. Bless you all.