I believe my mother is my hero

Blanca - Coolidge, Arizona
Entered on July 16, 2008
Age Group: 30 - 50
Themes: family, gratitude
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This I Believe

This I believe. I believe my mother is my hero. The first thing that comes to mind when I think about my mother is everything she endured to keep the family together. Though the obstacles were many, she managed to overcome them.

My mother was raised in a family that did not want her. When she was only three her then single mother got married. With this new marriage came the decision that she was no longer welcome by her mother. Her grandmother Michaela then raised her as her own. As a matter of fact it is her grandmother’s name that is on her birth certificate in the mothers spot. My mother never met her biological father, although she did have the opportunity to meet him and chose not to. He was on his death bed and wanted to meet her; however in her eyes it was just too late.

At the age of 14 she became pregnant with my sister, and shortly after got married to my father. I wonder while married to my father if there were ever times in her life when she felt safe and happy. My father is a controlling, overly jealous, and abusive man. My mother was brought to this country where she had no friends or family to rely on. She was the one that provided us with clothing and lunch money. If not for my mother our birthdays would’ve been forgotten, even if she went without, so we wouldn’t have to. Some of my most vivid recollections of my childhood were memories of my father making my mother cry with the constant degrading, yelling, and physical abuse. Lots of times we asked ourselves as children and even now, why she did not leave him. I understand now that I have children of my own that being a single mother is something she did not want to tackle on in a strange country and the constant threat of taking us away from her is probably the worst threat he ever made. When we were children the word love wasn’t used very much. We were never told that we were loved or that they were ever proud of us and I couldn’t understand why. I now realize that it is because she herself was never told those things either. I look at my beautiful children and I hug them and kiss them and tell them I love them at least a dozen times a day. Just the thought of not having my children makes me cringe.

After more than 30 years of marriage it was finally my father that left my mother. It was very difficult for my mother to accept the divorce. It’s been four years since the divorce and my mother is now the happiest she has ever been. She no longer has to feel threatened, abused, or mistreated in any way. She had to endure more than any person should have to. It is she that came out the winner in this story, because now she has the love, admiration and support of her four children, which to say the least is not something my father has earned. This and because of a million more reasons is why I believe my mother is my hero.