I believe everyday is a new begingging or death

Victor - San Diego, California
Entered on June 2, 2008
Age Group: Under 18
  • Podcasts

    Sign up for our free, weekly podcast of featured essays. You can download recent episodes individually, or subscribe to automatically receive each podcast. Learn more.

  • FAQ

    Frequently asked questions about the This I Believe project, educational opportunities and more...

  • Top Essays USB Drive

    This USB drive contains 100 of the top This I Believe audio broadcasts of the last ten years, plus some favorites from Edward R. Murrow's radio series of the 1950s. It's perfect for personal or classroom use! Click here to learn more.

I believe that everyday is a new beginning or death.

I was only ten years old when I got involved with gang violence. I didn’t really know what you had to do but it was tight, well that’s what I heard. When I turned 13 I got jumped into a Mexican gang. It took 13 seconds for them to jump me in. I didn’t know why 13 until they told me. It represented the Mexicans because the 13th letter in the alphabet is M and M is for Mexican.

Everyday was the same until the day a car pulled over and started to fire, I ducked and it hit three of my homies in the back. That day I saw my homies die. I tried to revive them and had them in my arms begging God to please not take them but I realized it wasn’t a game, was reality. After that day my heart grew smaller and my respect grew bigger. Respect was all I wanted and heart was nothing to me. I didn’t cry; it didn’t hurt me seeing my mom cry for me because of my behavior, it was awful.

There was another day when one gang member came over to my turf at night. I saw him and whacked him with my bat. When I saw him on the floor it made me realize how much harm I was doing to people when he didn’t even do anything bad to me. Something was missing in my life and it wasn’t family love but it was “love” love.

I realized that when I met my girlfriend Jessica. She didn’t react to me like others did she looked at me with sadness that I was hurting myself and others. I saw she actually cared for me so I wasn’t going to lose that, so I got out and changed my life just for her. Everyday I thank god for sending me an angel to make me realize how happy life can be without any worries about dying and now I am still with my girl. I still believe everyday is a new beginning or death. But I thank god for my mom, my girl, and a new beginning.