I Believe in the Power of Loss

Rachel - Erie, Colorado
Entered on May 19, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30

I was 16½ when I lost my mother to breast cancer. After a 4 year struggle with chemotherapy, radiation, and the spread of her cancer, it finally overtook her body with rapid force until she could no longer handle it. My mother was a strong, amazing woman who was taken from the world way to soon at the age of 49.

This enormous loss in my life left me gasping for air. My father was of little help to me since he had practically abandoned my family when my mom was diagnosed with cancer. The rest of my family, although trying to be supportive, were also of little help and just seemed to cause me more stress and problems. We were all just trying to deal with our grief in our own way. To say the least, I was basically left to fend for myself emotionally and become even more independent, and I had to do it quick.

The changes I had to deal with were overwhelming at first. Rather than having just one person telling me what to do, my entire family was in my face about everything. I was forced to move from the home I had been living at for 15 years of my life and give up many of the freedoms I had been used to. I became unmotivated to do school work which created a feeling of disappointment for myself seeing as how education was one of the main things my mother had cherished in her life. The void my mother had left behind in my life was inescapable. However, I used her loss to better myself as a person. Many people have been amazed at my strength in dealing with the situation that was handed to me, but I wouldn’t have dealt with it any other way. I am strong, I am independent, I am self-motivated, and I am my mother’s daughter.