It Will Be Okay

Brittany - Enfield/CT/06082, Connecticut
Entered on May 12, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: purpose
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I believe everything happens for a reason. I spent too much time in my life worrying about what was to come and feeling regret about what had already happened. It took me several years after the passing of my grandmother to realize what will happen cannot be changed and it will all be okay. We can grow and change from what we experience, and everything will happen with an intended purpose.

She was my friend, my mentor, my shoulder to cry on, my grandmother and so much more. When I was a little girl, at the age of 9, I spent a majority of my time with my grandmother. She lived right next door and was always there when I needed her. I know they say no one is perfect, but I think she was as close as one could get. From her spoiling me, her everlasting support, and her compassionate ways, I couldn’t help but love her more than anything. The day she was taken away from me left me feeling helpless and empty. I cried endlessly feeling as though things would never get better. I was too young and too naive to understand that maybe, just maybe, I could get back to feeling normal and possibly even better.

Of course I would give anything to spend just one more day with my grandmother and I will forever miss her. However, after reminiscing one October night with my mother on an anniversary of her passing several years later, I reflected myself on the days that I shared with my grandmother. I realized she gave me more in my life than happy memories and material objects.

I was so lucky to grow up with such a great role model in my life. She was a strong, independent woman raising three children on her own. Her husband left when her children were very young which forced her to make sacrifices to provide for her family. Through this, she taught me to be grateful and more family oriented.

She gave me the strength to make decisions and have confidence in myself. I look back on how much support and love she gave me on just simple things like a dance recital or good grades. I now know that I am capable of making bigger decisions. I always do things I know will make her proud. I know that she is up in heaven always looking down on my family. She is with us even if she can’t be physically.

I believe everything happens for a reason. A reason we may not find out until later, but one that helps us to improve our lives. So even if you feel like you’ve hit the lowest feelings possible, don’t give up. We should take hard situations and make them positive. Take it as an experience that gave you an opportunity to learn something new and make you a better person.