Confidence and Self-esteem

alicia - Luxemburg, Wisconsin
Entered on May 2, 2008
Age Group: Under 18


When I was a little girl at daycare, one day we had to draw a picture of ourselves. My closest friend and I were going to draw a picture of both of us together. That was the first time that I realized that I wasn’t like her. We had a different color of skin. She started to draw me with the wrong color skin. I looked at the picture, she looked at her picture and realized that she had used the wrong color. It was then that I actually looked at my skin in a different way and realized that it wasn’t like hers. Her skin was white and my skin was brown. She didn’t realize it either, and it wasn’t a big deal. She just switched crayons, but at that very moment, I realized that we weren’t alike. We had two very different skin colors and neither of us noticed until then.

I believe that what I think about myself is what others think of me. When I was growing up, it was really hard because I thought that I didn’t fit in. I thought that I was weird and different and that everyone looked at me because I had darker skin than them. Well, once I learned that I was just like everyone else, there was really no difference and just because I had darker skin than another person. Well, sure I was different on the outside but really on the inside I was no different at all. We both like the same things like running and playing outside. We both liked to play with Barbie dolls and everything else that little girls like to do.

I must have high self-esteem to get anywhere in the world. If I let people walk all over me and I don’t have any self-esteem or respect for myself you can’t gain respect for others either. You don’t need have to have so much self-esteem that you are arrogant, you just need to be confident in what you think and do. When your conscience is telling you don’t do that, what are the people going to think about you, you won’t get anywhere in life. I can’t live my life in fear of what is going to happen to me or what I will do. Life is about taking chances and moving forward with your mistakes. I have to have confidence in myself to do the right thing, even if I’m not like everyone else.

It is always okay to be afraid of what is going to happen, just don’t let those fears control you and keep you from fulfilling your dreams. If I don’t believe in myself I can’t have fun. I won’t be able to show my feelings to anyone if I don’t even know my own feelings.

What I think of myself is what others will think of me. If I thought that it mattered that I wasn’t like her I wouldn’t be able to go on with my life. If every single time that I went out in public and thought about how I looked I wouldn’t be able to live my life to the fullest. What I think of myself is how others will start to think of me also.

I have to know what I want and where I want to go. I can’t think about others and how to please their lives. Being different has helped me realize that, not everyone is going to like you; you can’t live in fear of what others think though. Everyone will always be afraid. It’s just your confidence that makes everyone different, too.