faith in me

Allison - Jessup, Maryland
Entered on April 26, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30
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I believe in faith. Now, as someone who has not been to church in years, except on Christmas Eve to satisfy my grandparent’s wishes, this may sound a little strange. The faith I have is not the kind that requires me to read an old book full of stories, or get on my knees before bed, it is the kind deep within myself. Growing up is different for everyone, I know, but for me it seemed, and really still seems like the biggest struggle. I have always seen my friends having the time of their lives and I have always felt so distant. With no one to turn to I had to do something. Of course there were darker times where the “resolution” was really only creating other problems, but once I was passed that I was able to find faith within myself. Sometimes I think if I were raised more religiously my life would be much easier, but then I realized how absurd that is; I would never want my life to be any different, especially not any easier. Throughout my harder times instead of say waiting for some miracle, I had to find something within me in order to strive on. As challenging as it was, I never game up and that is because of my faith. The faith I found was in the strength I have to succeed and the beauty I have learned to see everyday. I know I am stronger than a bad day, or a low grade on a test or a missed shot in a lacrosse game. And I have learned the beauty of those bad days. I appreciate the challenges I have faced in my life and love that I have had to overcome them on my own. Not having faith in a higher power or something bigger than me has made me be the higher power and the something bigger in my own life.