I Believe in forgiveness

Jamie - Monroe, North Carolina
Entered on April 17, 2008
Age Group: 30 - 50
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I Believe in Forgiveness

Growing up I would sit and daydream about my life, what kind of man I would marry, how many kids I would have. Three children boy, girl, boy in that order, God granted it to me. I’m the oldest girl of three children, the last one to get married and the last to leave home. Of course, I was in no hurry. It was always hard to make up my mind about things. I would ask someone else’s opinion first, to help me out which gave me choices. My husband is over confident and willing in that area to guide me in what he thinks is best.

My children are sixteen(boy), thirteen(girl),and nine(boy) very different but look alike in their features. Everyone has always said that we all look alike. When my first child was born, we did everything together. We would spend more time together than his dad would because he was on the golf course. My husband is the only child, and I love him dearly, but my mother-in-law loves him more as she would so kindly put it. Sometime she would appear so genuine, and, at times, totally the opposite. I am still praying for situation so that I wouldn’t take to heart even though it hard to I love her anyway. I’ve always gotten along with people, this required some effort because people are different. I did what I could to try to please my mother-in-law, it was a no win situation if it wasn’t on her terms.

When my oldest was about nine months old, he was trying to take steps in learning how to walked by grasping on to things for support. My mother-in-law felt no one could take care of him like she could. One spring weekend we wanted to get away for a day. So we did and i felt guilty leaving him with her. I was not married at this particular time. My sister decided to have a party for my cousin, so we went while my mother in-law babysat for us. We returned the next morning, and she met me, and my husband outside explaining herself that she didn’t think that she had to call to let us know what had happened. I ran in the house to find my baby’s hands wrapped in gauzes, lying on her bed asleep I had never felt so bad for leaving my baby that night. I cried endlessly, asking God to remove the anger that I felt for her in my heart and to touch his hands to remove the pain that he was going through. He suffered first degree burns from touching a kerosene heater were she had to pull his hands from. She had company that day that took her mind off of him. I was in shock he was just learning to walk, and, because of his surgery with skin graphs, wearing a cast, I thought this would delay him. I was so wrong, God answered my prayer. I found forgiveness in my heart for her, and, thankful that my son is alright. I have been blessed in the whole process, the nurse had to come out to clean his hands in making sure no infection appeared. That was very painful to see and to hear, I’m so proud of him. He is left handed and draws like a professional artist. I will never know if the burns had anything to do with him being left-handed or right-handed, but he was so active as a child nothing stopped him from having fun. I’ve learned that holding on to past hurts only damages the spirit and the heart. Finding forgiveness is the best thing for everyone because no one is perfect.