Trials are not a curse!

Dani - Pleasant Grove, Utah
Entered on March 27, 2008
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: setbacks

Most people do not want to experience trials. They say that trials are too hard, and that life is unfair. They ask “why is this happening to me”, and “why do I deserve this.” Hardships are painful and are generally viewed as a curse. Although I do not look forward to trials, I adamantly believe that trials can refine each of us into a better person.

When I was in eighth grade, I began hanging out with the wrong crowd. This group included all of the ‘beautiful’ people. They seemed very self-confident. This group presented terrible things in a good way. Anything was acceptable in their conquest for popularity. If somebody got in their way, they were simply thrown aside without a second thought.

Eventually I became one of their victims. The result was devastating: rumors, mean notes, and nasty emails spread throughout the school. I heard caustic remarks and lies about me from everyone. I thought that everything was broken, and that life could not keep going. Everything I had placed value on had disappeared. I felt lost, hurt, and angry; the person I once was had vanished. I had never felt more alone and I wanted to give up and hide. I was blinded by self-pity. I asked over and over why this had happened to me.

My mom told me that if I gave up I would empower them, and that I could not hide. Thanks to my mom’s advice I dragged myself to school the next day. My new resolve did not make my problems vanish; in fact the next day was worse than my previous days had been. None of my friends stood by me, and I ate lunch alone for a little over three months. I knew that I had been a selfish, self-centered, insecure teenager who was too absorbed with her own problems. I had not stuck up for myself or for anybody else, and I hated the person that I was pretending to be.

A year later I tried to become a better person; I began sticking up for myself and for others. I became more confident and self-assured. I began to love myself, and I realized I did not need other peoples’ confirmations. Today I am less self-absorbed and more compassionate than I ever thought I could be, as a result of my eighth grade trials. Instead of looking at my own problems; I look for the girl eating lunch alone and show her that there is hope. While my eighth grade year was a year of hardship and struggles; the next year evolved into a year of self-discovery. Now I am the kind of person that I want to be.

Hardships can seem terrible and hard to experience. They almost break you; they make you feel like giving up. While trials are not something we look forward to, remember that trials are not necessarily a curse and can be an unforeseen blessing.