This I Believe

jessica - brookfield, Illinois
Entered on February 20, 2008
Age Group: Under 18
  • Podcasts

    Sign up for our free, weekly podcast of featured essays. You can download recent episodes individually, or subscribe to automatically receive each podcast. Learn more.

  • FAQ

    Frequently asked questions about the This I Believe project, educational opportunities and more...

  • Top Essays USB Drive

    This USB drive contains 100 of the top This I Believe audio broadcasts of the last ten years, plus some favorites from Edward R. Murrow's radio series of the 1950s. It's perfect for personal or classroom use! Click here to learn more.

When I was just 12, my brother, Kris, was about to graduate 8th grade. His best friend, Brad, and him were inseparable. They loved hanging out, and just doing whatever crazy they could think of. I remember May 28th, my mom and I went to pick them up from the skate park, because it had started to drizzle. When we pulled up, they were laughing hysterically, running to the car in the pouring rain. Whenever we saw them together, it was all smiles and fun, never a dull moment. Brad was the happiest kid you could have ever seen, and I was ecstatic that my brother found a friend so uplifting. A change of events completely caught me blindsided, and I felt like I could hardly breathe. Just one day after we saw him, a fatal gunshot wound killed my brothers companion on the 29th of May. The craziest thing was that it was Brads own hand that did it. Kris was completely shocked. He had no idea why Brad had done it, and especially if he meant it. The happiest kid he had ever met, had killed himself at 15, and he can never know why. I believe that you never truly know a person. You never can know exactly how they feel or what they are thinking. The entire school felt the pain of losing Brad. He was known as the jokester, the clown, the one any person could get along with. The question everyone was asking was why did he do it? To this day, my brother still hurts from the remembrance of his best friend. I talk to him, about how life could have ended up different, and if he could have changed anything. The one response he always says plays over and over in my mind. If only Brad had called me, maybe he would still be alive. If only we knew what people were thinking, would the outcomes be different. But its over and done with, and my brother and I won’t know what Brad was thinking until we see him again. Knowing a person varies from certain degrees, and I believe that only a psychic can truly know a person inside and out.