This I Believe

Entered on January 24, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30
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This I believe…..

Growing up I always knew I had two parents. In fact, my parents were married for twenty-one years, but I was raised in a single parent household. My father was in the military and as a part time parent, my father cared more about anything and everything that didn’t involve his family. I remember all of the firsts that he put us through. I remember when he moved my mother as well as my two older sisters and I off base into a small three bedroom apartment in Apple Valley, that’s the middle of no where New York and left us to fend for ourselves. My mother’s income alone was not enough to pay our fourteen hundred dollar rent payment, utilities, and food each month. On top of which we needed clothes and school supplies. There weren’t many nights we had to go to bed with no heat or wake up to total darkness because the lights got cut off. Fortunately, the military cares about their families and one call to “That Man’s” superior officer, that’s what I call my father, we were back on base and those troubles were over.

When I was nine I saw my mother cry for the first time, and for the first time I was old enough to understand where those tears came from. It wasn’t to long after that when I asked him to leave for the first time, I figured if my mother wasn’t going to do it for whatever reason somebody had to. As my words hit “That Man” in the face I actually saw a tear fall from his eye. At that time I thought to myself that maybe, just maybe he wasn’t ready to give up his family yet . Maybe he was going to make more of an effort to make if known that he needed us in his life. Things were smooth sailing for a good two years, until I was eleven, until the day one of my best friends came to school with a brand new outfit on and said that my father bought it for her. My father was once again MIA and I as well as everyone else knew where he was. That evening I broke the news to my mother and she didn’t even get mad. She proceeded to shower me with wisdom and although I don’t remember everything that she said I do remember theses words; ”you can’t make a man stay if he don’t want to.” That is so true!

While I do remember those words, there were many words that my mother didn’t say, words that she couldn’t say. It took along time for me to figure out that not every girl wants a man like her father. In this one lesson I came to learn a lot, men can make women do some interesting things in the name of love, but while we’re out here looking for perfect man lets not forget to stay true to ourselves. It starts off with your hair color, then its oh, you lost to much weight or you gained to much weight, then it’s the clothes your wearing and whatever else and while their happy with the newly reformed you, your miserable. We must always remember that there’s going to be a million things that we may not like in the world, and there’s going to be a million people who fail to like something about you, but you cant change for everybody. You can only be you, and that is what I came to believe.