This I Believe

Milagros - Chicago, Illinois
Entered on January 22, 2008
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: love
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Love isn’t always blind

Love isn’t always blind, Living day by day, knowing that this addiction was killing me inside, deeply. Everyone around me said I was blinded by a fool. I didn’t listen I didn’t want to hear the truth. I was truly in love, but I was in love with a person that loved me but not in the same way I did. I would break down in tears, and always say “no everything is okay, don’t worry” when people asked me, but truly deep inside I wanted them too. An abusive relationship was that addiction. Eagred to always come to the same bullshit, hoping everything would be different this time around. Silly me always with tears in my eyes. I was like a crack addict coming back even when the supplier was out. A daily routine, more as a habit. A habit that grew and grew. A girl with a broken heart… that was me. Maybe soon he’ll love me back, the way I loved him.

Never came the day that he laid a hand on me. The way he talked to me; it was all like he didn’t care. He didn’t mind the things that people said about him. He was cold as if he had no emotion. No emotion towards me or to himself. The day came where I saw another girl being treated the way that everyone said I was being treated. I was devastated, seeing another human being treated like if they were nothing. All these years I was with someone that wasn’t worth my time, my tears, and my love. All to him I was a game, that when he was bored he played with. I finally realized that this wasn’t the life I wanted to live. I wanted something more in life… than just a random guy that would kiss me turn his back and kiss someone else. The love that was once there soon turned into anger.

The pain was unbearable but there was nothing left to do. Why should I be in a relationship where there is no love towards him? He was dead to me; he didn’t have a reason to be in my life at all. Not even as a friend. Telling myself its all for the good. Millie you came so far to turn back noticing I was hurting the people that I really loved and loved me. Taking it out on them when they ain’t have anything to do with the situation. However I found someone that was the complete opposite, then that cold hearted being. Someone that understood me in anyway that I could be understood. I can truly say that I am in love and he is in love with me. There is no more wasting my time on a guy that won’t give a damn about me the second I’m out of his sight. He doesn’t mind my past but is more interested in the future. I’m with someone that cares for me for who I truly am. People say when you truly feel for some one let your heart guide you. It may not always be right, but you never know. It just may surprise you. Love isn’t always blind. This I believe.