This I Believe

Samuel - New York, New York
Entered on January 9, 2008
Age Group: 30 - 50

When I pulled into the parking lot of my newspaper in San Diego in May of 2002, I burst into tears because I knew what I had to do.

My life was a good one in those days. I earned a generous salary. As a higher education reporter I regularly flew from San Diego to San Francisco to cover the University of California Board of Regents. I owned property in Southern California during a time when the market was spiraling upward. And I had a high profile beat, often landing me on the front page. But deep down inside, my intuition was telling me to leave it all.

It had started in January of that year when I began to have a feeling or a sense that I needed to leave my job. The small voice, which I call intuition, or depending on the point of view, the voice of God, or my spirit, soul or heart, or the higher self, began to make it clear. “It’s time to go.” “You need to leave.” “There’s more out there for you.” It wasn’t an audible voice, but more of a deep, inward knowing in the way I know my name.

My hand trembled as I gave the senior editor for news my resignation letter. He smiled at me, shook my hand and told me the secret to making the transition was to write every day. He told me the names of other people who had left the business and that if he could afford to take the hit in salary, he’d do the same thing.

As I packed up my desk and left newspapers, a career that had nurtured me for thirteen years, a feeling of well being swept over me like I had never known. I traveled a bit, sat in coffee shop, wrote and chased projects that went nowhere.

Within months I had landed a part time job teaching as an adjunct professor at a university in the Midwest. The faculty spurred me on to go to graduate school and pursue an MFA in creative writing, which I eventually did in New York City, working part time at a literary agency and now a small publisher, intuition was my constant companion.

I believe in intuition. Some say that intuition is reserved for women. It’s reserved for whoever will get quiet enough, turns off the music, television or Internet and simply listens.

Being intuitive doesn’t mean necessarily that one is psychic or knows everything about everybody. It’s just having the ability to tune in deeply to a feeling channel, sensing things within and without when one is in a relaxed state.

I don’t recommend people quit their jobs without a healthy savings account or some kind of a plan in place for the future. But sometimes the best thing to do is the least logical thing to do.

In fact, it was my intuition leading me to write this essay.