This I Believe

Alison - Denver, Colorado
Entered on January 5, 2008
Age Group: 30 - 50
Themes: parenthood

My son loves to nurse. He does it all the time. We call it “snursing”; which is a blend of “Let’s nurse”. In the morning when he first wakes up, we nurse. Before his afternoon nap, we nurse again. He nurses after dinner and before bed- and definitely during the night. Sometimes he nurses if he hits his head and sometimes when the world seems too big. Sometimes, my son will just nurse and nurse and nurse for no real reason at all.

My son likes to nurse on the couch, all wrapped up in a blanket. He likes to be wrapped up from his toes to his nose, with the corner of the blanket for a hood. My son likes to nurse on the bed, with the covers pulled all the way up. Sometimes he even likes to nurse lying on the floor in the middle of the room. He will point to a spot on the carpet and in his little voice say, “Snurse”.

I don’t always agree to lie in the middle of the room, but I do my best to nurse my son whenever he asks for it, because I believe that I am a Human Pacifier.

I believe that my son needs to nurse. I believe that he needs to have contact with his momma in a way that is just about us. I believe that by nursing my son, he is learning that he can trust me. To trust that I will be there for him when he needs me, no matter when, or where. Or why. I believe that I am able to give my son the gift of me, of my undivided attention, when we are nursing.

I believe that by nursing my son now, without expectations or requirements, that I am teaching him to be a more caring person. That he is learning that it is possible to set your own needs to the side, momentarily, to meet the needs of someone else. I believe that by sharing the natural gifts of my body, I am teaching my son to value the natural gifts of his own body in hopes that he will cherish and respect his body and the body of others when he is grown.

I believe that my actions serve to pacify; that they bring my son comfort, that they bring peace into his little world. I believe that as my son becomes a man, he will use the examples that I have given him as a road map for how to travel through his life, and that one day, he too will bring a little peace and comfort into the world.