This I Believe

Valerie - Schenectady, New York
Entered on December 13, 2007
Age Group: Under 18
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The Game of Popularity

“Never was and never will be you’re not real and you can’t save me and somehow now you’re everybody’s fool”

– Evanescence (Everybody’s Fool)

I really believe this quote! The band is mocking those popular kids and celebrities who think they’re all that and more but they’re really not. I agree with this because I went through the same popularity cycle in elementary school and now I know how really stupid I looked following the group leaders around everywhere and tagging along like a puppy.

You see in fifth grade I was going to the middle school and very nervous. But I still was in elementary school. I had a lot of friends in fifth grade. So as the year went on my “friends” grew farther and farther apart from me. I didn’t really think about it much as I was always so busy. Then I started to hear rumors about me going from person to person. And yet I still believed I was a popular kid! I was also afraid to be different from my popular friends thinking I would be kicked out of the group. But time went on and my friends started to not speak to me. I wondered what I did wrong and why my “friends” weren’t accepting me anymore. So I confronted them and they told me that we weren’t friends anymore because they didn’t like my other friends. So I was alone for a while and it was rough at first but I got used to it over time. How sad is it that I was used to being alone when I got to middle school?

But those other girls and I aren’t friends anymore and I couldn’t be happier! I have my own personal style now and I don’t care what other people think about me. I’m not afraid to stand up now and be different. But before that I had to hit the bottom first to actually realize that those girls weren’t my friends! I actually got an IM once from a girl who was in love with popularity and wanted to be popular so badly that she gave up one of her friends because her friend wasn’t cool enough for her popular friends! Can you believe that?! But I felt sorry for her and I knew she would learn the same way I did. Now when I see those popular girls walking down the halls, all the same never different, I feel sorry for them and I never want to be one of them.

But I also see those wannabe’s and I used to be one of them. They tag along behind the leaders and popular girls and basically do what they’re told to do by their “friends”. I look at them now like WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?! But I look at it like a lesson because even though I see how stupid those girls look I have to remind myself that people once saw me the same way I see those girls now. That freaks me out so I’m never EVER going back to being popular. (Not that I ever was I just thought I was). I also feel sorry for those girls because I know that they don’t do a lot of this because they want to. They just do it to fit in.

I mean just last year one of my best friends dropped me as a friend and my other best friend took my old best friend’s side and it made my life a nightmare for about 4 months. You see she thought she would get a lot of friends and be popular for the gossip she was spreading around about me. And it did for a while (or it seemed too) but it backfired on her because people started to see how untrue it was. Anyways her and my other best friend started making new friends and

they only hung out with their new friends. It was like they forgot I existed and that hurt a lot. So I confronted them about it and asked them if they could make it a point to still hang out with their old friends and they agreed and said they would. Time went on and nothing changed and I was starting to feel lonely. Then people started coming up to me saying that my “best friends” were talking about me behind my back. Then one of my best friends stopped talking about me but the other one didn’t. She kept talking about me and she ruined my life for a long time. So finally I was sick and tired of this fight after a while so I asked my best friend if she was talking about me behind my back and she lied at first but eventually admitted to it. Now the thing that really bugged me was she didn’t sound sorry and she said she was basically not going to stop. So we had a talk, all three of us, and we worked it out. My one best friend did say sorry to me but the other one didn’t say sorry to me and that showed me she didn’t care. So we’re not friends anymore and I think she may still be talking about me. I don’t know but I do know that I’m not going to let it bother me again.

So now she’s not popular and I’m happy because I have managed to make new friends! I’m still friendly to her but we’ll never be best friends again. I’m not sad about what happened I just hope she realizes someday that popularity is a game and I don’t want to play anymore.