I Believe the my Father is Watching Over ME

William - Bloomington, Minnesota
Entered on October 20, 2007
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: death, family
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Over six years ago my father passed away. His death was caused by Cardiac arrest. For the first few years immediately after I was very sad and confused. I never expected it to happen and it came as a complete surprise. It could not have been predicted and there were no signs of any possible problems previous to the incident. I missed a few weeks of school, not to recover of course because that would be impossible but to try and get back on my feet. When I went back to school every body was very nice to me but it was still very difficult, though I appreciated the kindness none the less.

Half way through that summer I moved to Guatemala with my mom, which made it harder in some ways and easier in others. It made it harder because I was away from my family and friends but easier because I could get my mind off the event and turn more focus to the future. I made new friends in Guatemala and when they would ask of my father I would be evasive which was very easy to do being as they knew nothing about him. I was still very sad about losing my father but as I said it was easier in some ways. It was like I had started a completely separate life, it wasn’t like my life had flipped upside down it was more like my life had just taken a separate path. I went from being like everybody else one day to being completely different the next.

Now, at this point in my life I think of my father and I believe… I know that he is looking down on me. Whenever I am in a bad or dangerous situation or whenever I am scared I simply think “My father would never let anything bad happen to me” and I am calmed down. It always works to, I have been in plenty of situations where something bad could easily happen to me but I always make it out safe. Of course I know I there is a limit, I know I can’t decide not to study for a test and then think “My father would never let me fail this test” No I now not to do it doesn’t work like that. But when I was at the top of Pacaya an active volcano in Guatemala and it started erupting or when I was free climbing a 50 foot rock ledge I wasn’t worried because I knew my father wouldn’t let anything bad happen, “maybe a little scared but not as much as I should have been”.

I think…I know my father is watching over me and protecting me and this I believe