This I Believe

Maddie - Golden, Colorado
Entered on May 7, 2007
Age Group: Under 18
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Life Isn’t Fair

When I was told, “this is your last time to see him. You have to say goodbye”, I didn’t want to believe it. When I walked into the room and saw him lying there, I thought there had been some mistake. This wasn’t my grandpa. It couldn’t be. It just couldn’t. But when I saw the painful smile creep onto his face, I knew it must be him.

I believe that life isn’t fair. Things happen for no reason, when people don’t deserve it. Sometimes life throws things at us and “if you don’t quit, and don’t cheat, and don’t run home when trouble arrives, you can only win.” But I know people who have had heartbreak after heartbreak and life just isn’t fair.

When my parents first told me that my grandpa had cancer, I really didn’t think much of it. It didn’t change his life at all. But when I knew he was getting sicker and sicker, I just had to see him. When I visited him for the last time, and had to say goodbye, I wanted to kick and scream. It wasn’t fair he got cancer! He never did anything wrong. I walked into his room and it scared me to see him so weak and skinny and sick. I wish I could remember him as the happy, jolly man he always was. I said goodbye and told him I loved him, but I still felt like something was missing. I didn’t tell him that I was proud of him for living his life fully until his last days. He was the bravest man I know and probably will ever know.

When we got the call two days later, I was hysterical. I didn’t want it to be true. I secretly hoped that the Papa I knew and loved would just get up out of the bed with a big smile on his face and go eat some chocolate cake. I hated the doctors for not curing him. I hated my parents for not letting me visit him more. I hated him for dying.

At the funeral, it finally hit me. I wasn’t the only one he left; I wasn’t the only one who was grieving. I realized that even though life sometimes isn’t fair, when Papa died, he went somewhere where he couldn’t feel any pain. Life isn’t fair all the time, but sometimes, that is for the better. Life would be incomplete if everything were perfect; nothing is worth having unless you have to fight for it.