This I Believe

Samantha - Taylor, Pennsylvania
Entered on April 17, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30
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“Gross” “Fat Face” “Ugly” these words and many others of come have out her mouth only to bash my self-esteem. I don’t believe she realizes how deep words stab me. How they rip open my gut, and burning my insides. The words plummet through the door of my house hurting the only occupant, my heart. No matter how strong I may seem, a few hurtful words can make me fatigued. Only my mistakes will be seen and told.

We used to be friends. However, now we are bitter rivals. I have nothing against her; I never have. But, for some reason hatred seeps out of her pours aiming for the target on my chest. I don’t know when it was that she started to resent things I have done or even to make fun of the way I talk or move. I know that once I turned 17 that’s when I started to hear the whispers, the sly, rude remarks said behind my back. When confronted with the accusations that I had done this or that, my only defense was to stay strong and keep saying they were lies. One day everything finally got to me and I broke down. I was a car running on empty for far too long. My transmission had combusted, my engine failed to run. I eventually spoke to a counselor to talk about everything that was on my chest. It’s a year later I now know that I shouldn’t have let such hate get to me. I am my own person and what I think, say, and do makes me who I am. I may not be the prettiest girl or the most intellectual. I have my thoughts and I am proud of who I turned out to be. This I believe.