This I Believe

Matthew - Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Entered on January 31, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: pleasure

I believe in laziness. Waking up everyday with my only intent being to do as little as possible and get the maximum enjoyment out of it. This however is not to be mistaken with efficiency, which is a waste of time and effort. I believe in rolling over every morning and hitting the snooze button at least three times so I can avoid life and put off any daily tasks. I believe in sleeping on the couch because the effort it would take to reach the bed is not worth it. I believe that coming to class occasionally, sleeping during the lecture, and waking up in just enough time to fail a quiz is the key to an enjoyable college life. I believe hard work is overrated, and that motivated people have yet to feel the satisfaction of laze. Laziness, betters the soul by allowing man to be in a constant state of idleness where a man can be free to respond to any situation accomplish any task and leap any hurdle, which hopefully will never happen. I believe in taking life as it comes and not going out of my way to change things or shape them in anyway, in this manner lazy people and fatalists are exactly alike, both are too apathetic to make any real stand in life. I believe sloth is, quite possibly, the best of all the seven deadly sins because it accomplishes the same goal as all the other sins in that you go to hell for all of the sins but you put less effort into laziness for the same result. Brilliant! I believe in being too lazy to think of a real topic for an assigned essay and try to bullshit my way through it so I can get a C in class, get a degree in the arts (the laziest of all degrees) stumble my way into middle management and have a mediocre life, drive a minivan and have an average family. I believe in leaving my full potential untapped. I believe in saying “I coulda been..” and exploring possibilities of what I should have done, and in doing so avoid doing anything. I believe that I am done with this essay, not because I have said all that there is to be said, but because I am too lazy to explore the topic in greater depth because this would take away my time to sit on the couch and watch daytime television. In true spirit of laze, I will not spell check, proofread, or edit this essay in anyway.