This I Believe

Danielle - Lynchburg, Virginia
Entered on December 8, 2006
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: family

I believe families are the foundation of all relationships. The way a person interacts with their family will affect their relationships with everyone else. I believe that a person can control how they interact with people but it will take work because many characteristics are acquired when you are at an early age. Your family has a great influence on you as a person and people tend to pick up their family ways unconsciously.

I can remember the past when I would go visit my fathers’ (which once in a blue moon) side of the family. I never felt apart of that family and always considered myself to be an outsider. I never showed any emotion just as no one else did. I didn’t realize this until writing this essay. My father’s side never showed me any love which made me not feel loved and caused me to not show them love. It wasn’t until my sisters’ graduation six years ago that I told anyone on that side that I loved them. I remember writing these exact words in the card although I don’t show it; I just want you to know that I love you. To this day, I have never actually spoken the words I love you to that one side of the family or showed them any form of affection.

As far as my mothers’ side, we tell one another all the time and I am so thankful for that. Knowing that when I glance back at the years of my school age family gatherings; it was always filled with happiness, love, and tears of joy, is the reason I am able to reciprocate those interactions with other people. Currently, I have such deep compassion for people and often show great intrapersonal skills. I believe the way I interact people will be necessary in the future as well as right now.

As I sit back and watch my nephew of two years old tell my mother I hate you, cursing at her and be so resilient; I can not help but think it’s not his fault he treats people so bad. On his mothers side of the family although, they may love one another deeply, all he witnesses is them fighting with weapons, cussing at one another, and even many of them cheating on spouses.

So whenever I see him as well as anyone else treating others badly, I will not be so quick to say “how could they do that” or “I would never do that to so and so” instead I will feel sorry that in their life they obviously had an unhealthy relationship with their family when acquiring interactive skills.