This I Believe

laine - milwaukie, Oregon
Entered on December 7, 2006
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: golden rule

Throughout the last 3 years of my life I have believed in karma, and it is now one of the main points of my life. After everything that has happened to me, karma is why I live my life the way I do. There have been many times in my life where I have wanted to give up my values and be a crazy uncaring kid, with no morals. But then I think to myself and realize how much I need karma in my life, and how much it has helped me in the past.

I used to be a very selfish person, and I didn’t care about anyone but myself. I did things that may have hurt other people, but I did not care because it would end up helping me. When my friends would have problems in their lives, I would just brush it off my shoulders and not care about it, because it was not my life, and not my problem. I believed that it was their problem and that if they wanted to fix it, then they could do it themselves. I did not want to worry myself about problems that had nothing to do with me.

When I finally realized that I needed someone in my life I felt weak. In my mind I thought that I would never need someone, ever. When my grandfather died, I let my guard down, and I finally realized that I needed someone in my life to comfort me, and be there for me, right by my side. But why would someone be there for me when I was never there for them? I did not deserve any help, and I didn’t get any. I knew that I deserved what I got, I deserved nothing.

I called my best friend, but I could tell by her voice that she cared, but wanted to have nothing to do with it. I was very hurt by this, and I then finally figured out how I must have made her feel when I would just brush her off. To me it seemed as if she was just being selfish and uncaring, but what could I expect from her? Only what I had given to her, and that was nothing. From then on I always helped my friends, so when I needed them they would be there for me, just like I was for them. I learned that this worked about a year later when my grandmother died, and my best friend was there for me, because I had been there for her for the past year.

Karma is now one of the main points of my life; I felt the effects of karma, and I do not ever want to feel that again. If someone asks me the littlest thing such as if they can have a cigarette, I will give it to them, because I never know when I will need something little from one of them. I do not ever want to mess up my chances of getting help with something that I need, this is why I will never be selfish again in my life, and always follow the rules of karma.