This I Believe

Lisa - Fairbanks, Alaska
Entered on November 14, 2006
Age Group: 30 - 50
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The Universe Provides is a philosophy I embraced long ago. It comes in handy when feeling bereft. I chant it like a mantra to get me through…the Universe Provides. And in times when all is good, and I’m not sure how or why I’ve been so blessed, I breathe it like amen: the Universe Provides.

Whether the Universe is God or your own form of divinity is up to you, but trusting in the absolute rightness of what happens in our lives, even if it’s scary-bad, that is a larger, universal truth that takes solid faith, no matter the shape. Even if the Universe serves up some hard to swallow stuff sometimes, it is often revealed later that it Happened For A Reason.

When the stock market plunged into the abyss a few years back, I’d just met my husband-to-be. I was giddy and reeling. Just as suddenly, my job was in peril and I realized this blessing of a marriage late-in-life to a wonderful man was supremely timed. I would have someone on whom to fall back, we could take care of each other. Well, only half right.

His business started floundering and divorce had gutted his credit. My credit was okay—I’d been able to buy my own house, had savings—the Universe Provides. Until, all-too-soon, the bank account was empty and the cards were denied, insufficient funds. We tried to sell the house, but after 18 months on the market it was clear…Michigan’s economy was giving us the squeeze.

Dodging phone calls from creditors, my unemployment benefits running out—the pressures and fears building like bricks cemented to my soul, escape routes seemed sealed. A gasoline credit card that I’d not used in years, had forgotten I’d even signed up for, arrived in the mail one day with the sunny notice, “Here’s your Replacement Card.” I’d gotten a reprieve. We could at least buy gas to drive to see his kids, and to visit my mom, who would feed us delightful meals and bolster us with laughter, and the card would get us to job interviews. The Universe Provides.

The week that credit card started giving me all-too familiar rejection notices was the week I got the call—I was offered the job! We’d reached a brink, and just before the plunge, there dangled a vine. I grabbed for it; it held.

I’d like to tell you what a great job it is, or rather was—the fact is I had to give it up when my husband finally found a new job, after the excruciating decision to move out of state. We headed, of all places, to Alaska, shortly before eternal winter had set in (first snow, September 29th!). My aunt wants to know what I’m supposed to learn from all this…what is the Universe telling me?

Here I am—not a winter person at all—job hunting all over again, waiting for the slow return of the sun…. And repeating my mantra: the Universe Provides.