This I Believe

gabby - Albuquerque, New Mexico
Entered on November 9, 2006
Age Group: Under 18
  • Podcasts

    Sign up for our free, weekly podcast of featured essays. You can download recent episodes individually, or subscribe to automatically receive each podcast. Learn more.

  • FAQ

    Frequently asked questions about the This I Believe project, educational opportunities and more...

  • Top Essays USB Drive

    This USB drive contains 100 of the top This I Believe audio broadcasts of the last ten years, plus some favorites from Edward R. Murrow's radio series of the 1950s. It's perfect for personal or classroom use! Click here to learn more.

Crybaby sally… I’m fishing with an ugly boat, and every time I say it’s an ugly boat it gets uglier. Why am I not happy with my boat? It floats on the water just like the others, and no one else thinks it’s an ugly boat. I should be happy with my boat, because I just caught a fish. Most often I have felt lonely, no matter how many people surround me, they all seem like dark shadows against a dark background. So I would sigh, and carry myself like a kicked puppy. Since I started high school I had pondered over what felt wrong in my life. I came up with a lot of ideas but deep inside I knew they were just poor excuses. I lay on a lunch bench outside of class, trying my best not to think about a recent breakup. I felt lousy and I needed someone around to help keep my spirits up. Then it hit me, everyone who mingled around me, my “friends” still had nothing to say to me. I hated them for not caring about me and even when I realized how selfish I was acting I was still whining. A few weeks later, I started talking to old acquaintances. After a few weeks of talking, confusion and more talking, I now consider them my friends. I regret that I didn’t get to know them all sooner. Then my perspective changed, I listened to their problems, and for once others listened to mine. They got me to look at myself and say, “ Hey! Stop being so self-conscious.” Everyday I look in the mirror I see myself differently. Is it because I’m changing, or am I still the same? I realized that I talk to a lot of people and they like me for me, isn’t that enough? So what if I got dumped, I don’t need to be in a relationship all the time. In the end I’m done fishing in my high school bathtub. Every day I’m going to look in the mirror and say,” quit being such a cry baby sally!” No offense to anyone named sally.