Life is Short so Share Your Feelings

I remember the day like it was yesterday. I came home from school, and my dad me told that Jacob, my 27 year old cousin had been in a car crash and was in a coma. My heart broke into a thousand pieces and I dropped to my knees sobbing uncontrollably, my chest heaving. He was like a brother to me and I couldn’t imagine life without him, and so young with so much life before him, ripped away from those who loved him.

He was driving back home from work to Papa’s camp and when he turned a car bumped him into the next lane and he was t-boned by another oncoming car. When I think about that moment I can hear the screeching of the tires and glass breaking, and his screams and yells as he was ejected from the car because he wasn’t wearing his seatbelt.

That night I couldn’t sleep and I laid awake all night thinking about him. The time he bounced the basketball of the front of my house and made it into the basket behind him and we went crazy, shouting and cheering. Or the time he taught me how to toss goldfish up in the air and catch them in my mouth,and I accidently threw one onto his face. As I lay there in bed I tried to figure out and understand why it had to be him. He was such a good guy and everyone that he met would never be able to forget him. He loved me when I felt like I had done so much wrong that no one could possibly still love me. He touched the heart of so many people and now he lay in the hospital bed, unconscious and hooked up to a ventilator.

I woke up the next morning and tried to forget about Jacob and get through school. There was a pep rally that day, everybody came to the gym and we cheered,and shouted and sang and laughed. By the time I left school I was in a good mood and I had forgotten about Jacob and the accident.

When I got home from school my siblings bombarded all telling me that he was dead. I thought “there’s no way this can be true.”, but it was. Once again I dropped to my knees into a feedle position and sobbed until I couldn’t breathe. I got so out of controll my dad carried me to my room and held me, trying unsuccessfully to soothe me. I couldn’t believe Jacob was gone. My cousin, my brother, my best friend was gone, in the blink of an eye. I had no idea how to get through this.

That weekend we headed up to Lake Charles for his funeral. And that’s where I realized what I believe in. When the funeral started, the room was so full that people were standing in the back just so they could be there. Jacob, in his short life of just 27 years, had touched hundreds of people’s hearts and had lived his life to the fullest, even though he had had trouble in his childhood because of his dad that drank all the time. He even overcame some alcohol problems of his own early on.

Jacob was and always will be my hero, and his life and death taught me just how precious life is and how important to make sure that everyone I love knows that I love them because you never know what is going to happen and they can be gone in the blink of an eye. It may sound cheesy, but before Jacob died I always thought “There’s always tomorrow to make things right and change.” but that’s clearly not true. I should never assume there will be a tomorrow because anything can happen and I will never know if someone will be here tomorrow. I believe life is short and I have to make sure everyone I love knows I love them, because if someone I love isn’t here tomorrow or I’m not here no of us will have no doubt or question about the feelings we had for each other.