I Believe in Singing “Happy Birthday to You”

I believe in singing ‘Happy Birthday to You.’ It might sound corny, or trite, or perhaps childish. After all, I’m 38 years old. I know how old I am because of how many birthdays I’ve celebrated throughout my lifetime. And what goes with those birthday celebrations? Cake, ice cream, gifts? Yes… well, usually. And also, the often clumsy singing of ‘Happy Birthday’ by your friends and family.

You see, you don’t have to be an accomplished singer to have your voice appreciated on someone’s birthday. This is the one occasion when, even if you have a terrible voice, no one will judge you. No one’s going to hush you up with odd stares or sideways glances if your voice cracks or falters. Instead, everyone in the room will smile, nod, and sing along with you. And that’s a beautiful thing. Researchers have found that singing along with others releases positive endorphins in our brains that actually physically makes us happier. It’s as if we’re biologically hard-wired for group singalongs. I imagine our earliest ancestors sitting around a fire singing some sort of ritual songs. A sense of community is what kept our ancestors warm and fed and what led to our survival and progress as a species.

This insight reminds me of the first time I sang ‘Happy Birthday’ at a friend’s party. Andrea, a perky blonde girl who lived a few houses down from where I grew up, was having a classic birthday party—cone hats, noisemakers, and games suitable for toddlers. When the lights were dimmed and the cake brought out, someone started in with the singing. I looked around at all the neighborhood kids. Up until then, I hadn’t realized everybody knew that song; I thought it was a silly song my family sang. Literally, this shared song drew me out of my small family and into the larger community to which I belonged—my neighborhood. I smiled a big smile and put my little heart and voice into belting out the birthday classic alongside all my friends in a bigger world I was beginning to explore. Even at four, I couldn’t miss on the words.

The best part of singing ‘Happy Birthday’ is the moment of elated vulnerability when you throw your often-lonely voice up onto the altar of tradition and community and belt out what’s probably the only song every American knows. I love that singular moment when—who’s it going to be?—someone amongst the people who appreciate you makes a fateful decision to raise their voice out of the void of silence or the drone of casual conversation and into the basic tunefulness of that most traditional of songs. Soon, they’ll be joined by the person next to them, then by another, until finally it’s everyone, raising their voices in a cacophonous chorus of birthday revelers. The feeling of shared positive experience—that maybe these people celebrating your special day are symbolically carrying you onto another year, with the ups and downs and moments of blah and beauty that go with it—that supreme moment soars on a wave until the goofiest of the bunch will no-doubt add ‘And maaany moooooore.’ You’ll smile, of course. Then, you’ll look around and nod, or sheepishly focus on the sweet candle-lit cake before your eyes. And somewhere inside, you’ll be agreeing with me. Because you believe in singing ‘Happy Birthday’ too.

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“Happy Birthday to You” was written by two sisters from Kentucky, Mildred Jane Hill and Patty Smith Hill. The current copyright owner of the song is Warner/Chappell Music.

Brian McDonald is a high school English teacher living in Akron, Ohio, where he grew up. Along with being a father and husband, he enjoys writing, playing music, staying active, and—of course—celebrating birthdays with his many family members and friends.