To Believe in Nothing

I believe in nothing. Perhaps I should say that contemplating, thinking, and dreaming of nothing is what I truly believe in. Minds that enter this world of nothingness require no thought, no analysis, no confusing algorisms, scientific notions, or 50-step recipes. Why is it that we are asked to cram our minds with so much information, so often? It’s time to shy away from the constant flow of new data into our brains in order to take a period to think, feel, and be what we have always learned not to be—nothing.

Achieving nothing is what I have been perfecting since I was young, either to escape some of the long, dragged-out lectures of my teachers or just to rebel against filling my mind with any useless information. This skill is not one that should be attempted by the faint hearted. It requires rigorous practice, skill, and technique. On this day, after seventeen years of fine-tuning and perfecting this talent, I can effectively activate my secret nothing world without even acknowledging its creeping presence. Fortunately for the rest of the population, embracing this magical world is an obtainable goal when approached with the correct technique.

Choosing the appropriate location for this feat is essential. Many times I experience my thoughtless daydreams during moments where reality is not the ideal place to hang around, when an escape is desperately needed, and when filling your mind with nothing is better than whatever is filling it at the time. For example, if you find yourself bitterly watching from inside the window of a cubical on a steamy summer day with a cool breeze, it’s time to get yourself out of your pathetic situation, pronto. You could just break the window down and jump out or you can take a chance and submerge yourself into the world of nothingness that will rescue you from your surroundings in a safer way. Please, save yourself the broken glass and take a shot at the latter.

When the situation is evaluated and decided upon, the next step is to just relax. Take the time to clear away your surroundings and everything around you that is causing you stress, anger, or any other unwanted emotions. As your body loosens up, allow your environment to disappear into the background. Experience the tingling sensation that numbs your core as you drift to a new state of consciousness. You know when you are doing it correctly when your eyes begin to widen and everything around you becomes blurry and discolored.

At this point you have successfully reached another dimension of reality where no outside forces can affect you. You are impenetrable. You are nothing and at this point in time, being a nothing is more rewarding, exciting, and worthwhile than being a something. I believe in finding the one place where you cannot be touched or bothered. I believe in daydreaming.