Another Chance

When you lose all hope it’s difficult to find it again. It is like falling down really hard, you don’t want to pick yourself up, until someone reaches their hand out to you.

My name is called, “Yes Sir!” I yell. I start doing my forms, move after move. In my head I think be sharp, have power, do well. After I am done I’m satisfied.09o8 I know I wasn’t awful nor an olympic gold medalists but I did the best to my ability so I was content. I sat back down and started waiting.Sitting on the hard yet squishy floor my heart was pounding out of my skin as the scores were being read out … No this can’t be possible…SEVENTH? I can’t get seventh! How? I did everything right! Not one mistake I can recall. I felt like I was about to explode out of anger, frustration, and it just made me lose all hope. Inside I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t take losing. I could almost taste the tears that were going to fall down my face soon enough. That’s not possible! I do NOT deserve this score! It’s not fair!In my mind I was screaming, screaming out of anger, sadness, and my desire to try was swept away.

Walking back to the bleachers, I cried. There was no way I could hold in my frustration. My eyes stung and my mouth started tasting salty as the tears rolled all the way down my face. The whole world became fuzzy and gray instead of the black and white world I used to know where there was white (good) and black (bad) and everyone got what they deserved. Life was equal, not anymore. Everything was upside down and spinning…spinning out of my control. So when I finally got to the bleachers I fell into my mom’s arms hoping to hear words like, “It’s okay baby, don’t worry,” but I didn’t hear any of that. I heard something better. “Show them up in sparring Gab”, mom whispered. I took this to heart. I realized it wasn’t over; it had only begun. I shook the tears off my face, popped right up, grabbed my sparring gear, and headed back to the place that started it all! The ring.

Walking towards the ring I felt like a new person. My opponent looked good, but good enough for me to handle. I felt good for the first time in that day. My coach was right next to me telling me how to score, kick fast, and everything else. In the stands were my friends and family cheering me on. I was ready. The match started. In a couple of seconds I scored a head kick. I felt like my body was about to collapse and I was so close to fainting I felt like my heart was about to pop out of my chest and all I could do was kick. The water was in my eyes and I could barely remember how to breathe but, I looked at the scoreboard and smiled because nothing feels better that pouring your whole heart into something and winning.

After that fight I still don’t see things in black and white, nor in gray, but in all colors. Sometimes we get things and sometimes we don’t. We just have to roll with the punches…literally. Now every time I get frustrated and I’m about to lose it, I take a big breath and relax because I know things will always be okay. It’s life so I know I’m not the only person to lose myself in something. I hope I will always will try to remember that no matter what there will be another chance and there will always be hope.