scrutinize life

天舒 - 北京, China
Entered on March 30, 2009
Age Group: 18 - 30

Let’s start from my story. It was a usual school day. I could not remember why but I was really really excited that morning and I kept talking with the girl next to me during the morning exercises, making faces with all kinds of gestures, consequentially and tragically paying no attention to the stern stare coming from behind the window: I was as stupid as the murderer in Rear Window, who never noticed that there was somebody watching over him.

My 14-year-old life seemed to be vanished when a high-pitched shout thrown directly towards me, penetrating the noisy background music of morning exercise. Frightened out of my mind, having no idea how to react, I froze up, for what seemed like an eternity. The teacher was so long-faced that I could have put a halter on her. Since I was still standing there, doing nothing, she was beside herself with rage and sang that shout again, which pulled me to myself. In great haste and panic I ran to her second floor office, which was always a upper hell to me.

Standing right outside the office, I saw her drawing the curtain of the window, from which she witnessed my “capital crime”. I took a deep breath before entering. I saw myself as if from a distance, the frightened girl who stepped up to the teacher as slowly as she could. When she found herself stood beside the teacher’s table, she suddenly understood why the teacher closed the curtain: Now the curtain blocked all her classmates’s view of what was happening in the office. She was completely moved by the teacher, who was an ogress ruffling her feathers to her just a few minutes ago.

Not surprisingly, I was scolded and put into detention for a week. However, I was still thankful of her little action that saved my face in front of my classmates. I felt cared for and respected. It was her kindness rather than the detention period that planted the awareness of discipline into my mind. I knew that I should never break rules ever again.

There you are, teacher. You understand what I believe: viewing everything without prejudice and observing life considerately bridge others to us. Under most circumstances, those we are unhappy with are not our real enemies but our parents,teachers, friends and colleagues who tell us harsh truths.While we are all ordinary people who prefer compliments. And this is why we usually misunderstand them, regarding them as hindrances in our way.

It has been a long time since then but I can still feel the anxiety and all the complicated feelings that morning. I felt so thankful to her attention to that small detail.