After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today,
Someday I’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain.
It was a school night during my sixth grade year. It was late when I got a call from my best friend. She said she was on the phone with Steve, a boy in our class, and he had attempted to commit suicide. This is one of my earliest experiences dealing with pain. We started a three-way on the phone as my friend and I tried to talk him out of it. He told us he had tried to drown himself, hang himself, and cut himself but he couldn’t go through with any of it. Together my friend and I were able to give Steve the help he needed by us calling out for help when he wasn’t able to. He had been suffering silently as the world passed by, but the world reached out that night the help he needed was given.
Two years later I began to experience some of the same pain that Steve felt when he wanted to commit suicide. I let myself fall into a pit of insecurities believing the lies Satan fed me. I told myself that my friends would be better off without me and that I was too much of a burden for my parents. I didn’t truly live. Instead I was going through the motions trying to figure out my purpose for living. I look back on that year as a year to not repeat. I look back and see how my friends stayed with me. I see how my parents still loved me and cared for me deeply. I look back and see how God saved me from myself. Through God’s love, I was able to break out of Satan’s grasp and grow from the pain. I realized how easy it is to dwell on one’s misery. This gave me a passion for helping others. I want to be there for the people that need a little bit of love to crawl out of the darkness. As I grew more, I became a true Christian and witnessed God’s everyday miracles. God was able to open my eyes and show me all I had to be thankful for.
From my experiences in life, I have learned to believe in the beauty that can come from pain. This may be the pain of a loved one, or the pain of one’s own heart breaking. From this pain one can see the love of their family and friends and witness the love of God. Growing from that pain can change how one looks at life and change what matters most in life.
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