The word divorce has a very negative connotation. In our society divorce is associated with arguing, pain, emotionally hurting children, and destroying a family. I think just the opposite. I associate divorce with less arguing, relief of pain, and helping children. I believe divorce does not ruin a family but bring it back together.
Some of my earliest memories are of my parents fighting. I remember several accounts where I would lie in bed at night, listening to my parents arguing and then one of them would come and tell me everything was okay. Do not get me wrong; I have many happy memories of my family. Most of the time everything was fine and everyone was happy but I still have bitter memories of sadness in my mind mixed in with all the good memories.
When I was around eight years old my parents called my brother and I into the kitchen. Somehow I had a bad feeling about what was about to happen as I sat down at the kitchen table. My parents then announced that they were getting a divorce confirming the bad feeling I had but I did not want to be true.
The next weeks, months, and even year were very hard and filled with sadness. Eventually my dad found a new house and we settled into our new way of life. It took a very long time for me to realize my parents would not get back together again but when I came to terms with reality I was able to see my situation in a new light. I was able to see that my parents’ getting a divorce was a good thing.
There certainly is less arguing. My parents sit next to each other at my soccer games and brother’s basketball games. My parents still argue once in a while but it is nothing compared to when they were together. I am thankful that they get along.
I am happier too. Everyone in my family is happier. Rather than being surrounded by arguing I am surrounded by love and happiness. My dad is remarried and my mom has a boyfriend. I see my parents and I know they are both happier.
My family is also much closer. My family has set up a system of fifty/fifty custody; because of this I am able to spend equal time with each parent. Now I feel like I am able to enjoy the time I spend with each of my parents more.
Although from the outside it looks like my family has been split in two, I feel that I have two families. I have two houses and two safe havens. I have two families that love me and for that I am grateful.
Divorce can be very painful at first but once the pain subsides life is happier for everyone involved. I wish society would realize that divorce is not always a bad thing and can bring a family back together.
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