I believe in independence.
As the end of high school draws to an end I find myself with an internal conflict as to what to do about my future. With each step I take it draws me that much closer to the end of high school, which inevitably brings a smile to my face, but like a quarter each step I take is two sided. Though the summer means an end to high school it also means an end to a pre-planned life, or rather an end to my dependent lifestyle. I’ve always thought of myself as being a very independent person, thinking back on days and events where I push the help of my family aside to overcome obstacles myself.
My first clue to independence hit me in my early youth on a vacation, I was with my dad and we were snow boarding down a hill. This being my first time snowboarding it was only obvious what was going to happen, face plant after face plant. I remember the anger swelling up inside of me and the frustration of not being able to stay up on the board. The helping and encouraging words of my father only seemed to fuel the fire of my frustration. With temper rising and my dad trying his hardest to help it was only time that was saving my dad from the pain of the full force of my eight year old punch. When it happened and the explosion of my anger overcame me my dad did in fact feel the wrath of a frustrated me. It was then that I found myself alone in my thoughts and focusing on the task at hand and remarkably snowboarding down this gigantic hill. Feelings of accomplishment and pride came to me like none other and it was only then that a feeling of remorse came to me for the actions I’d taken earlier. So as I turned back up the hill to look for the familiar face of my father, it was a great shock to find that he was right next to me and with a smile on his face congratulated me on what I’d accomplished, my feelings of remorse totally shadowed by the love and happiness which surrounded me.
Not known at the time was how much this event would impact me and how I would grow up finding myself becoming more independent each day as to seek out that same great and astonishing feeling of accomplishment.
Some say that independence is a sign of weakness or in Kelsey’s words “Independence is a sign of weakness which means you have a wall around your heart.” I however find myself with an open heart and open mind living from day to day with the basic knowledge that independence is a key to growing and only through independence can one understand how to strengthen ones self.