Sometimes the cover of the book really matters

Courtney - Alexander, Arkansas
Entered on March 10, 2009

I believe that judgment is a necessary evil.

My sister is an absolute angel. She is bubbly, blonde and beautiful. She was a great high school basketball player, and a virgin Barbie Bride two years after graduating. She was a night watching chick flicks with a couple of close girlfriends when the rest of the school was partying. My sister is a first sip of alcohol at the age of twenty, and a decision that she “must be allergic, cause it didn’t taste good at all.” She would give an arm and a leg and her last penny for those she loves. But she would never give the time of day to those she deemed unworthy.

The kids who live for those weekend drunken blackouts.

The guy who gets high behind Love Auditorium parking lot.

The girl who has had sex with most of the football team.

Kayla would never look twice in their direction.

And God, did our parents love it. She was literally the perfect daughter in her time under their roof, and now I am left with two of the most spoiled parents in the world.

Because I don’t drink.

I don’t do drugs.

I am not having sex.

I can honestly say some of the dearest relationships I have forged over the past few years have been with those “unworthy” individuals. I mean after all, who am I to judge their actions? Shouldn’t that be left to a higher power? I have not walked in their shoes, or seen things through their eyes.

But it’s taken until my senior year to see things through Kayla’s eyes.

I’ve taken the hard road. Judgment is easy.

We are taught from an early age right vs.

wrong, and if your world is black and white, discernment is not difficult. But I have painted my life a beautiful monochromatic, with a million different shades of grey. I have made exceptions and gotten burned. I have been torn and had my heart ripped out at the funerals and the hospital beds. I have seen sex, drugs and alcohol in all their glory, and I have watched it fade into a million different shades of grey.

Kayla has not. Black and white, She has right. And she has wrong. She has her pride. Her husband. A huge heart and a beautifully closed mind.