This I Believe

Kelly - ballston lake, New York
Entered on March 4, 2009

“I have always believed, and still believe, that whatever good or bad fortune may come our way we can always give it meaning and transform it into something of value.” This I believe. These words illustrate one of the most major parts of my life, something that has honestly changed me forever. This event being the end to a lifetime friendship I had with my former best friend. She was not just an acquaintance or a friend from a sport; she was my best friend, and up to that point the only person who ever had been.

We had walked through almost every branch of life together since the age we were eight. In ways we were almost identical, but in many ways, extremely different. We had laughed until we almost wet our pants, cried until we couldn’t any longer, and had so many memories together its hard to put words to them. We could talk about anything from the most complex topics down to the dumbest things in the world. Yet we both had are extreme differences, she was incredibly smart and was an athlete. However, this never meant competition for us; these differences just made us push one another harder past our own expectations.

It was about a year ago when things started to change. I started a select basketball program which took me out of state almost every weekend for a few months. Going from being with each other every waking moment to waking up and her being so far away, it was terrible. We would call each other every night to get updates on the latest gossip even though I only left for one or two days at a time.

Though, as the season went on, we started calling each other less and less. Sure I would see her I school, but that always seemed like forever away. Understandably, she started hanging out with a group of people we both had always been really good friends with. Honestly, this did not make upset at all since it’s probably them same thing I would of done if in her situation. But, as the season neared its end I finally realized that she was nowhere to be found. It was odd enough that I hadn’t been with my best friend in weeks but when she didn’t answer my calls I knew something weird was going on and I was totally in the blue.

We went days without talking to each other and awkwardly passing each other in the hall. I knew that it was partially my fault that I had always been gone, so I decided to say something because the whole situation was getting unbearable, since we had never fought before. I finally went up to her house one day where we could talk in private. This is when she said some of the most hurtful words she had ever said to me. Right then my heart had literally broken. This went on for weeks; I was getting blamed for things that I’ve never done and being called terrible things. All because of something I loved doing and from someone I cared for a lot. At this point I went through a long period of hopelessness which was truthfully one of the worst times of my life.

To this day I am still no longer friends with this girl. I went through a period of time when all I did was hate her but I soon realized something very important. By doing this I was only hurting myself. By not looking into the future and overanalyzing the past nothing was getting accomplished in my life. This event took me a long time to get over and still to this day hurts a little bit, but it has taught me to be strong. I believe that in life, things like this are put in to see how you can handle them. This obstacle has taught me to keep my head up high even though holding it down is the easiest thing to do.