I Believe in Never Settling

Richard - Murrysville, Pennsylvania
Entered on February 25, 2009

How many of you know someone who isn’t living life the way they want to? I believe in never settling. I think we all know people, including ourselves who have done it. And regretted it. We all reach points in life where we are unhappy, and usually if we think about it we can figure out exactly what the problem is. The problem is we often look at our unhappiness, then look at the problem, and decide it is too hard to fix. We look at what we have to give up to make our lives better, and we aren’t willing to sacrifice. Or maybe we are just too scared.

We get scared that if we quit the job that is making us miserable, we may not find another job. We convince ourselves that working ten extra hours a week and going in on Saturdays is okay because we have convinced ourselves that we need it. We convince ourselves we need that certain socio-economic status, and the stability it provides. We settle for the loss of happiness in return for material stability.

We get scared that if we say “no more” to getting hit by the person who says they love us, then no one will love us. We get scared that no one will be there to hold us when we need someone. We believe they love us, and that they get angry sometimes. We believe it’s our fault they get angry, and that we are lucky that they deal with us. We settle for them because we believe they are settling for us, and because we think no one else will.

I believe that we all make these conscious decisions to settle for the things we know are not right for us because we are fearful of the unknown. We don’t want to step away from our unhappiness to step into a new pair of shoes that we have never worn before. We shy away from change to stay with what we know we are comfortable with. We settle for things that we know make us unhappy, because we know them. We know we have them, and regardless of how they make us feel, we know how they make us feel, and somehow that makes it ok.

Most of us just settle when we hear of the AIDs and malaria epidemics, especially in Africa, and tell ourselves there is nothing we can do. We settle and put up with racism because maybe it doesn’t affect us, or maybe it’s not worth the risks to say something. We settle when we hear about the genocides in places like Darfur, maybe because we think ourselves insignificant and incapable of bringing about change. I’m sure that’s what people tell us. So why should we settle and listen to them? The American Revolutionists never settled, Rosa Parks never settled, Mahatma Ghandi never settled, and I can assure you, no one that settled and accepted the status quo was remembered for very long.