This I Believe

laura - gold canyon, Arizona
Entered on February 15, 2009
Age Group: 30 - 50
Themes: change

This I believe

I believe in the power of change or the power of what comes with change.

I am one of those people that even with the best laid plans for what I want to do

And what life expects of me are always two different things.

This week my current employment status is changing.

I am going to reach my forty third birthday this year and I have learned with absolute certainty that nothing is for certain and all we really have in this world is change.

My hubby and kids have moved thirteen times in the span of our lives together .

Each move has been exciting and infused my life with the newness of our new home our new neighbors our new life. I get the itch to move usually around two years in to a new home it starts with a discontent. Somebody says something unkind or something happens that takes the shine off of where we are at . Its almost as if my soul ready for some more new learning gets me primed and ready for the next change and all the new things that

Come with it.

I am a self confessed control freak I was raised by and am drawn to those of my kind.

I simply feel much more at peace if I draw upon the belief that I can actually control

my destiny. My email is

What does that say about how my life shows me the way, fights like two dragons with

my deep desire to have my say in to control what happens to me.

When Obama was elected I felt like holy cow my eyes are really wide open the change that the world is so ready for has come. What happens in the world happens when the world is ready for it . There is a natural course to things that we know not the reason for but wish we did. The fact that such a young human being has been chosen for President

Is a big hello to the fact that life as we know it is ready for the next big change , we are ready whether we know it or not are ready to as well .

So looking back on what I have just written I see those two dragons large and dangerous inside me the one who wants to stay and the one that wants to go and I understand why my life is such a rollercoaster.

I embrace change fully yet I fight the cost every single time, my faith in humanity is severely tested every time the change comes yet when I stop amidst the chaos I realize have never felt so alive.

Some might think I must be a adrenaline junkie something must be wrong with me but I believe that I came to this place to learn and to do it big time why waste my time by digging in my heels and making the pain last longer, life and god have plans for me what they are I don’t know but I want to walk into the center of the storm with eyes wide open.

I want to live this life with both feet in my whole heart in it

.Knowing this living contradiction within my i can understand myself more clearly in accepting what I am how I love myself and as a result love others is more keen and intense it causes me to live my life fully with all of my being.