Next week, I’m having my fourth spine surgery in two years. I’ve got degenerative disk
disease. After this operation, half of my spine will be fused. I’ll be tethered-together with
titanium rods and screws. Each time I come home from the hospital, I’m shocked that I’m
still alive. I will lie in bed for weeks, propped-up on a mountain of pillows. I won’t be
able to read, because I can’t use my arms. My hands won’t turn the pages. I can’t watch
television, because the Inquisition-designed neck brace I’ll be wearing, won’t let me. All
I can do is listen and think. I’ll listen to NPR, James Taylor, The Beatles, WEST SIDE
STORY and SPAMALOT. I’ll think about my past and my future; my three, amazing,
talented sons; my incredible friends and family and my genius doctors. I’ll imagine
stories and characters; novels and screenplays. And I’ll think about the things I believe.
I believe that the meaning of Life is to feel as alive as you can for as long as you’ve got.
I believe that what women really want is to be taken care of, and what men really want is approval.
I believe that the least lovable people need the most love.
I believe that everyone looks smarter in a library.
I believe a woman will always tell you the price, if she bought it on sale.
I believe the quickest way to a woman’s heart is through her mind.
I believe we love people more when they love us back.
I believe that people want to laugh. At anything.
I believe that the smartest people know what they don’t know.
I believe that people who cannot laugh at themselves deserve to be the butt of the joke.
I believe if you can’t say something nice, say something nice, anyway.
I believe we create the relationships we will have with our adult children before they’re born.
I believe that if you can’t be with the one you love – it’s okay to cry.
I believe if someone is threatened by you, it’s because they want to be you.
I believe that covering up a pimple doesn’t mean you don’t have a pimple.
I believe that if you’re mean, you are doomed.
I believe that our children want us, more than they want stuff.
I believe that people are more interested in what you have to say when you whisper.
I believe we are more fascinating when we listen, than when we speak.
I believe that the Sense of Smell is the most under-rated of The Five Senses.
I believe that smiling is contagious.
I believe my best teachers are my children.