The Character I am Playing Today

Jenna - 10913, New York
Entered on January 22, 2009
Age Group: Under 18

Helen Keller once stated, “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved”. These words represent the character developed throughout Helen Keller’s lifetime. I believe that each individual needs to cherish their hardships and imperfections, in order to find themselves, their personality, and their character.

I believe that no matter what, every person is different and has unique qualities that can be found within. Strength, morale, and courage are all developed through maturity, not straight out of the womb. I feel that if people lack challenges, obstacles, hardship, and difficult experiences, they are missing a piece of themselves, making their lives less than picture perfect.

For me, obstacles are far from uncommon; however, I still struggle to get through them. My daily struggle lets me interact with my mind, in telling me when to relax, how to cope and deal with situations, and how to have a relationship with myself as a whole.

As a soon-to-graduate high school senior, the college process has been a tedious one. However, the task of “building up immunity”, as I like to call it, started before I had my colleges judge me. I want to go to college to focus on a performing career in musical theatre. Musical theatre is very popular and hard to accomplish, but I was ready to jump right in and get started. Choosing colleges to apply for was not overly difficult, however pressing the “send” button on the application, is not as cake-like, for I knew some colleges would be more lenient than others would.

Since I was a young girl, I have been overweight. My looks have always surpassed my personality and charm, and have made it even more challenging for me to find and retain self-confidence. The college search has given me hope (that I am soon to get out of Rockland County and explore different places), and yet it continues to beat me down.

My weight is an issue in musical theatre. When I go to my college auditions, the first thing that runs through my head is, “Suck it in, Jenna!” when I should be encouraging myself to relax. Typecasting is a term used for when an audition committee automatically cuts you because of the way you look. I am a victim of typecasting, because it is not easy for casting directors to put a “fat girl” on stage, no matter how talented.

I have been through typecasting on numerous occasions, and I will continue to go through it, for I am not giving up on what I am passionate about, because of prejudices. I am determined enough to stand in front of people that promise to judge me from the moment I step foot in the room, because I have character. I have guts. I have poise. I have self-confidence.

If I were able to breeze through an audition room as a 5’8”, 130-pound beauty, I would however, what would I have to show the committee other than a pretty face? If they want me, for all x number of pounds of me, then they will take me.