It was February 16, 2008; a classmate of mine decided the world would be better served if he took his life. Not only was my entire high school and community crushed, but I struggled as well. It was at this time that my wise band teacher taught me one of the most important lessons of my life. And that’s why I believe in the healing power of music.
I saw this power in the week following my classmate’s death. As I played many different kinds of song, happy, sad, dark, light, angry, soothing, I could notice and see the physical and emotional change of the people sitting in the room with me. Though, while I was playing my music, I couldn’t really notice my own feelings. I noticed all the feelings I had been to numb to feel all at once while speaking in church. Everything at once came flooding to me, I just simply broke down crying, right there in front of four to five hundred people. I knew then how much music had changed me.
I was angry, simple as that. When he decided to take his life, I was angry. There was one particular song that, just because of the style and tone, just angered me. I got so mad at him for doing this. Why did he do this, how dare he do this. This music just brought all the anger right out, right to the surface, no more hiding. But immediately following the loud, fast, angry song, we played a slow beautiful piece. My whole demeanor changed, I began to become sad. Why did he do this, didn’t he see all of his good, didn’t he see that people loved him?
All the music that I played brought the emotions right to the surface. In order to make music, you have to put your heart and soul into it. And by doing this, I poured everything I had into the music that day. No holding back. I wasn’t able to keep my emotions to myself. They weren’t allowed to be bottled up, I laid them all on the table for all to see, and I’m better off for it. I was able to understand others better, I was understood better. I feel sorry for the others that had no way to express all that they were feeling. I was healed by the power of music. I believe in it; it will never fail.