For the better part of my life, I’ve battled myself on the existence of God. I spent my childhood Sundays popping in and out of different churches, but for the most part I remained unsure at best. I was very conflicted on the matter until recently. After thinking it over I decided that I do not believe in God, per say, but I believe in the idea behind God. While there will be some out there who write me off as soon as they learn of my statement, I don’t mind. To them I say that belief itself is what gives us strength, even if our beliefs vary. The reason I do not believe in their god is the same reason they don’t believe in anyone else’s, and while I don’t share their beliefs I strive to accommodate and accept them. Certain people need God to navigate through the harsh, sometimes ruthless world today. God is a front for hope, a hope that there is something more, that we are something more. As far as I’m concerned, “God” has done more good than harm (not to say that there has been no harm done). What I truly believe, though, is that there should not be the incentive of heaven or the threat of hell to cause someone to show kindness, love, empathy, or acceptance to another. This is my problem with God; God is all too often used as a justification. Not only a justification, but a pardon. The noble front for hope has been warped and twisted into a gateway of rationales, self-righteousness, misgivings, intolerance, violence, strength, wisdom, hatred and love. While some good still remains, it’s hard to ignore all the bad. Bring back the idea. Bring back hope. This I believe is all that can be done.
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