Owning My Life

Wendy - Saint Louis, Missouri
Entered on December 23, 2008
Age Group: Under 18

I make lists. I make to do lists, to buy lists, to see lists, to read lists, to remember lists, all kinds of lists. Some of the most interesting and unique lists are the ones that have my goals: my school goals, my home goals, my friend goals, my short term goals, my long term goals. Often times you can collect and compare my goal lists from several weeks or even years back, and see little difference between them. You would think that years would make a difference in my goals. However, even if my lists don’t change, I am changing. A lot of times my goals have to do with bettering myself. I often reflect on who I am and most of the time, I don’t like it. I believe that every person is in charge of their own life, and anything a person doesn’t like they can change. I often times don’t like who I am because I feel I could be so much better, so much nicer, so much more. So I write a list, I write my goals. My goals are more like promises to myself to do better, but writing them down and turning them into goals makes them tangible. Writing them down time after time, year after year, reminds me to never take steps backward. I have the same goals because it is always a struggle to do the better thing, but the rewards are so much greater. At points in my life it seemed that I would never reach any of my goals, but as I hit high school something changed, I made the change. I started making my goals happen for myself. Instead of accepting my bad habits I began striving to change them. But it never comes easy, I work hard to be what I want to be, and I still have times when I feel I can’t fulfill my promises. I pity myself then force myself to keep trying.

I am nothing special, good things happen to me because I make them happen, and everyone else can make them happen too. I try to encourage other people to think like me. Whenever I hear someone complain, I am compassionate towards them before telling them to make a change or stop complaining. Anyone and everyone can take charge of their life and make his or herself better. One thing that has helped me is I always make sure to celebrate small achievements. Most people don’t understand my excitement in not eating the chocolate cake, learning another measure of music, or keeping my room clean for a week, but to me big successes are the sum of many little successes. Any progress is big progress.