Turning My Life Around

Steven - Provincetown, Massachusetts
Entered on December 19, 2008

Throughout my life, I feel that I have been tested and had to overcome some obstacles to learn a lesson. There is much experience that can be gained from this and it can provide us with an education that we cannot learn anywhere. The education we gain from our life experience is something we get to use, to influence others and to hopefully make a difference in our lives.

During most of my adult life I was lost and had no direction. There were some goals and dreams, but I could not handle the responsibilities that needed to be overcome to make them happen. “Why pay my bills when I could go out, have fun and meet people?” “Let’s run up my credit cards and ruin my credit because I spent all of my money on drugs and booze!” and “Can I live with you for a while? I got kicked out of my apartment and just need a place to crash”. These were all said too often.

I should have realized that since I was losing many jobs and could not keep a roof over my head that I would have thought to stop the partying and to get my act together. But the thought never entered my mind. I had dreams and goals and knew what I wanted out of my life. But I could not put the booze and Cocaine down. Cocaine was my friend. It helped me feel accepted. It helped me to blend in the crowd.

Somehow, during my wild youth I managed not to harm others or myself. Through all of this, I have escaped death. There have been a few times I was close, but still managed to escape. In all of the drug usage and promiscuity, I still managed to avoid contracting any life threatening STD’s. That is a miracle in itself.

Now, I have turned it all around. I have a stable home, a job, a car, and a driver’s license. I even decided that it was time to go back to school. It is time to make a difference in my life and others. It feels great to have accomplished these things and I know that I am on the right track, finally.

I had to overcome many different obstacles and it was not an easy thing to do. I had to learn that it can be a vicious cycle and I needed to break free from it. But at the end of the day, if I think about it, I know that the obstacles I overcame, and the mistakes I made gave me an education that I will not get anywhere. Also, I know that as I put my puzzle of life together, piece by piece, and step by step I will use the lessons learned from my life experiences. It will help me to make wise decisions in my everyday life. This I believe, I have learned and will continue to learn from my life’s experiences.